Oh dear lord. More.
*cracks knuckles* These are emails from Sean Fanboys! Oh joy!
Email 1 Super Metroid wrote:
The people on that forum are smoking crack
Awesome, we are all smoking crack. How about we all take a drug test. Oh that is right, that wouldn't mean anything because you were trying to insult us other than actually implying we are on drugs. Good job, we are definitely feeling the burn from that one!
Email 1 Super Metroid wrote:
No one who played Super Metroid remembers the final scene because of the “touching sacrifice of the last metroid.” That is internet wankery. Anyone who actually played that game remembers that scene because it’s when you get the HYPER BEAM! Yeah! Then you blast the crap out of Mother Brain, which is awesome.
I am seeing a major similarity between this guys views and Sean's views we might as well be criticizing Sean instead of a lapdog.
Email 1 Super Metroid wrote:
If Sakamoto wants people to love Metroid other M, he should put kick ass guns and weapons like the hyper beam into it, not “womanly maternal instincts.”
*facepalms* Ok you know what? If you want to mindlessly shoot things go play Halo, you might actually get along with those fanboys.
Email 1 Super Metroid wrote:
However someone wishes to experience a game is up to them. Let’s leave them alone on that.
Can't criticize you on that.
Email 2 Those Angry Fans wrote:
Hello Malstrom,
I’m a bit surprised you bothered acknowledging those crazy Metroid (or really Sakamoto?) fans. Sounded like they had enough to freak out and pop a vein over already. Anyway correct me if I’m wrong, but would you agree that the fans who are all about the narrative are really just low on imagination? Like, they can’t handle the ambiguity of the magical world of video games and must have some sort of logic or excuse to rationalize it?
Ah, ignorance to the max. We are not Sakamoto fanboys, however we trust in what he is doing and applaud for what he has done. There is no shame in that. Imagination? Well if this counts then I believe all of our theories and fanfics cover all that. We have imagination, we just want more canon. (I suppose.)
Email 2 Those Angry Fans wrote:
I think these are the people who desire sequels to stories that don’t need them, who hate a film that ends without a clear resolution, as if you need the writer to hold you by the hand and explain everything for you. They need to be told what Samus is feeling, because they can’t imagine themselves walking around Planet Zebes. Maybe she’s scared, or frustrated, or totally pumped? But Sakamoto explains it for us that surely, because she’s a woman, she must be feeling girly thoughts of babies and boyfriends. The beauty of “Samus” was that you only saw armor; no face, no dialogue, it might as well be you in that suit.
Exactly who are you trying to describe. I am pretty sure none of us really wonder about things like that. If anyone on here wants to cover this quote by all means do so.
Email 2 Those Angry Fans wrote:
Really, when it comes down to it, Samus is the suit. The woman inside is just a bonus. The fans of the narrative and Sakamoto himself seem distracted like an employee who keeps drooling over a female co-worker and is wasting both their time by hitting on her. They really ought to just be getting back to work, killing space pirates and metroids.
Ah, another fan who just wants to "Zap Metroids". I have already said what I wanted to about this.
Email 2 Those Angry Fans wrote:
I feel sorry for these fans because what they really want is either to have a relationship with Samus or some kind of movie or book about a girl in space who has maternal feelings, and they’re stuck with a video game. I feel worse for the real fans who want a video game about aliens and missile-shooting armor and we’re stuck with cutscenes. Make no mistake, I like Samus as a character, but I don’t need people telling me who she is or what she’s thinking
LOL. Dude, get off of your highchair. (Or is it high horse?) Personally I can't tell when it comes to you.
Email 2 Those Angry Fans Sean Malstrom's Response wrote:
What is animating them is Game God worship. If Sakamoto says Metroid was a certain way, then that is the way how it was. A Game God cannot be disputed.
OMG! Yet again, we worship no Game God and everyone else here would say the same. On to Email 3!
Email 3 Metroid and Story wrote:
*the whole message*
Congrats Fan 3! You didn't insult therefore, I have nothing to say to you. You presented your opinion in an appropriate manner so I applaud to you!
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Here is the thing fellow MDb'ers. I have seen so many similarities between these emails and Sean's own opinion. So these are definitely Sean fanboys. Now I have been known to argue for days, and this isn't done until they stop talking. Because I can keep this up, I enjoy it. I love it.
